LIFE: How to be a happier person, part 1
I’M no expert when it comes to happiness (who is?!) but over the years I have picked up a few pearls of wisdom that I like to remind myself of whenever I’m feeling a little down in the dumps.
Happiness can be hard to find at times but I’m a firm believer that to have more of it in our lives, we need to help ourselves. After all, the power always lies within.
Here are a few ways to help ‘turn that frown upside down’ and find more joy in your world.
Over the past few weeks I’ve had a realisation about what makes happy and successful people different from well, the rest of us and it is this – they express gratitude frequently.
Not once in a blue moon but all the time.
Seriously. Stop for just a moment and think about the happiest and most successful people you know. I guarantee you’ll find that they are the kind of people who know how to be thankful and appreciative of life.
Wise people know that gratitude is about being thankful for everything and everyone that comes into their lives, including the bad stuff and the not so pleasant people. Which is why you often hear many a successful entreprenuer talking thankfully about their past failures. (They don’t see them as mistakes but opportunities. How refreshing is that?!)
Gratitude definitely seems to be the key to being a happier person and I have to say, that weirdly, whenever I do try to find more reasons to be thankful, the more reasons I actually seem to find!
Really. Whilst there are rare occasions we may need to look at how we compare to others, like when it comes to how we fair in our jobs for instance, in the main, comparing yourself to others will bring you nothing but harm.
Because, whilst there is nothing wrong with finding inspiration in others, there is everything wrong in comparing and seeing ourselves as being ‘less than’ or ‘more than’ anyone else. Unfavourably comparing yourself to others is a sure fire way of getting yourself a one way ticket to unhappinessville so stop the rot! Just don’t do it.
My Dad once wisely told me that the problem with comparison is this: You’ll never come out tops. Ever.
For there will always be someone out there who is more successful than you, prettier than you, slimmer than you, richer than you etc
Not a good feeling is it? So stop looking out and start looking in. Be proud of who you are and thankful (see above) for your assets (and yes, you do have them!). Love the bits that make you, YOU and start believing in your own uniqueness and wonder.
Find the funny
Go on. Try it. Next time you have a really s****y day, try to find something funny about it. Guaranteed, it might not be easy but if you look hard enough, you will find something that will amuse you a little, if you let it.
There’s a reason humour is so often found in tragedy. And that my friends, is because we need it.
Life is serious stuff which is why we need to try and find more of the funny to help lighten it up from time to time. And let’s face it, it also makes life taste a whole lot sweeter too.
I, by no means, find this an easy thing to do myself, however the older I get, the more I’m finding it less challenging.
There are days when I could quite happily throw myself a big ol’ pitty party and whinge about everything I don’t have, wish I had, wish I didn’t have but I’m beginning to learn, that this is not the way to be!
We all have to start learning to accept who we are, even the stuff about ourselves that isn’t particularly agreeable. It’s ok to fail, it’s ok to be miserable, it’s ok to feel insecure about ourselves but it’s NOT ok to deny who we are.
The more we learn to accept who we are, the happier we will be. It really is that simple.
Change can be a scary animal to embrace but hug it hard you should, for more often than not it will be the making of you.
When it comes to these happiness rules, this is the one that I least struggle with, mainly because I enjoy change and am always drawn to adventure. However, even I am not immune to being completely shaken to my core by one of life’s great changes.
Take motherhood for instance. Nothing can prepare you for the way your life changes forever when you become a parent. Absolutely nothing. Until you hold your baby in your arms for the first time, you just do not have a clue at how different your life will be and is going to be for the rest of your life. It’s quite a sobering thought!
Being a mum has taken me to the highest of highs and occasionally, to the lowest of lows. It has changed me more than anything else has or perhaps ever will.
It has been emotional, scary, confusing, bewildering and mind blowing at times. But…(and here’s the thing) it is also the single best thing I have ever done. My life is richer, happier and more wondrous as a result and I am a much better person.
And this my friends, is the beauty of change.
Tune in tomorrow for the next lot of happiness rules! x
Till the next time,