FIRSTLY, before I begin, you should know that I think you’re pretty damn wonderful already.
However, it is the New Year, which means – in case you hadn’t noticed – that the whole world is on a mission to lose weight, get fit, be happier, become more successful etc etc etc.
The truth is of course, that all of us want to be the very best we can be.
And so, in a bid to help you become even more fantastic in 2014, here are five things you need to do this year to become the best ‘you’ possible.
Believe in yourself
When you feel like the whole world is against you, there’s only one thing for it. You gotta dig deep my friends and find within yourself, some belief, in YOU. Because it’s this tiny seed of self belief that is going to help you, not just to survive, but to thrive in this crazy ol’ world of ours.
Self belief is a pretty tough nut to crack. Some people seem to have it in bucket loads whilst others can’t seem to find a mere crumb for comfort. But we all need it, and we are all capable of owning it.
Along the journey that is life, you’re going to come up against all kinds of horrors. You may face rejection. You may be kicked in the teeth by someone you love dearly. You may be stabbed in the back by a close friend. You may be sacked. Humiliated. Laughed at. Envied or just treated appallingly by some god awful person for no good reason whatsoever.
But through all the crap, all the pain and disappointment, you’ve got to hold on to that little seed of self belief and know this: “you are ok and it will be ok.” Always protect whatever bit of self belief you can muster and know that you are capable, talented, loved and of value. Because you truly are.
Stop making excuses
For your sake. And for others. Just stop making them.
Excuses are made when we don’t want to see the truth. Or when we don’t want to speak it. They come from places of fear, doubt, insecurity and pain. So stop making them and stop accepting them.
Be honest with yourself and with others. Yes the truth hurts but self deceit is a lot more damaging.
Sort the wheat from the chaff
Ah people. There’s nothing as queer as folk is there? Which is why, when it comes to choosing whom you welcome into your life, you need to be picky and get tough.
Harsh? Maybe. But on this planet, there are billions of people, so why choose to spend your time or energy on those who don’t deserve it?
There’s a saying that ‘people are like drains or radiators’, which basically means that people tend to fall into two camps. They either drain you of your energy and zap your pizazz or they warm you up, get you going and make you feel, fan-bloodytastic!
So choose friends and lovers wisely. Listen to how they speak about others. Pay attention to how they treat strangers. Think about how you feel when you are with them.
Get picky, have standards, don’t accept shoddy behaviour and do your best to only surround yourself with people who sparkle with positivity, humour, kindness and intelligence. Human beings have a funny way of rubbing off on each other, so make sure whatever is left on you is only of the glittery, sparkling kind.
Never play it safe or small
Occasionally, there have been times in my life when I’ve chosen to play it safe or play it small, and on every single occasion, I have regretted it.
Times when I’ve worn a plain outfit instead of the one I wanted to wear in case people thought I was too glamorous, times when I’ve kept my lips zipped when I should have spoken out, times when I’ve smiled through insults because I just wanted to be liked. You know the sorts of things I mean.
But I tell you this. Whenever you chose to hide and dim your light, you aren’t protecting yourself or helping others. No, no, no. You are belittling yourself. Take a moment to let that sink in and then let me say it again.
You are belittling yourself.
Years ago I once rang a colleague at work and announced my presence on the other end of the line, with the words, “it’s only me.” It was something I said a lot, out of habit but then this happened. My colleague, very wisely, said to me: “Katie, you must stop saying that! Because when you say ‘it’s only me’, it sounds like you are apologising for your very existence. You are no ‘only’ Katie.”
Those words remain one of the best wake up calls I’ve ever had and I’ve never uttered that sentence since. So remember, you are no ‘only’. You are YOU. Amazing, wonderful, brilliant, you.
Never hide your light under a bushel. Let the world see your magnificence, whether some people like it or not.
Let 2014 be the year when you start to take risks, experiment, step out of your comfort zone, look fear right in the eyes and tell it to get ******.
It’s true what they say, fortune favours the bold. When you live life to the full, embrace change, tackle challenges head on, try new things, life goes from being good to incredible and amazing things start to happen.
Yes, being bold and brave isn’t easy. So, for those times when you’re feeling like taking the safe option, here’s a little exercise to keep in mind…
Shut your eyes, fast forward to your future and visualise yourself as an older lady, looking back on your life as you reminisce. When you look at her, what do you see?
Do you see someone whom is full of spirit, smiling and chuckling about all the mischief they got up to and all the crazy, exciting things they did? Or do you see someone whom is sad, dull, regretful and a tad boring?
I don’t know about you, but I sure as hell know which kind of older lady I want to be.
With love and pouts,