Pouting In Heels

Award-winning UK Parenting & Lifestyle Blog


WHAT people think about us?

What they may say behind our back or in the company of others.

Why do we care if people like us or not?  Some people will, others won’t.

So what’s the big deal?

Why do we care if people look at us in the street or when we’re out and about? Surely it’s better to be noticed than to be invisible?

Isn’t it?

Why do we care if people like what we wear?

I wear, what I wear, because it makes me happy. Shouldn’t we only dress for ourselves, in clothes that make us feel great?

Why do we care about the people that we shouldn’t? The ones who treat us poorly or are unpleasant to be around.

Shouldn’t we just walk away from those whom no longer make us feel good?

Why do we care about what other people say we should be doing?

As a parent. A colleague. A partner. Or a friend. Who’s life is it anyway?

Why do we care if people think we’re doing something wrong? We all have our own way of doing things.

What makes someone the keeper of all rights?

Why do we care so much about what other people think of us, that some of us stop being whom we are supposed to be?

That we may dim our light, hide our true selves or pretend to be someone else.

Why do we care how we appear?

Why do we want more likes, more followers, more comments?

Why do we judge ourselves by someone else’s opinion?

And isn’t it time we stopped?

As human beings we all have a desire to be liked, admired and loved. We all need to know that our time here, in this world, is worth something. We all crave to be seen, heard and valued.

Whether we are 18 or 78. A high flyer or a stay at home mum. That desire to be loved and appreciated is the same for all of us.

And this is why we care. But.




What if we started to like, admire and love…ourselves?

What if we started to realise and understand that…just by being here, we are worthy?

What if we started to truly…see, hear and value ourselves?

Would we care so much then, about the opinions of others?

Probably not.

So isn’t it time we started to do this?

And isn’t it about time we finally stopped caring…about what other people think?


With love,






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11 Discussions on
  • Spot on lady, I think ‘self-care’ is especially hard for mums because we’re so busy putting other people first. And then there’s the weird mish mash of judgements and guilt that seems to be part and parcel of being a mum, or aspiring to be that fictional ‘perfect’ mum. Throw in attempts to ‘have it all’ and we’re in a right old mess, aren’t we?

    But I think the beauty of growing older is learning to let go of a lot of these attitudes, and really to stop caring about what’s essentially irrelevant, and start focusing on what’s real. The funny thing is we begin as babies (if we’re lucky enough to be surrounded by loving parents/carers) with that confidence and sure sense of self. Maybe it’s one of those life lessons that everyone simply has to go through on this journey – learning that we’re worthy, just the way we are. Great post lady x

    • You’re right Uju, where does that confidence and self belief go?! As you say, it’s like we’re born with it and then somehow it gets knocked out of a little along the way. I look at Elsie now and she is so honest, true to herself and confident. You know if she likes something or she doesn’t. She’s not afraid to use her voice and share her opinions and feelings. I can only hope that she holds onto that as she gets older. Great comments, thanks lovely x

  • Lovely post, I’m going to recommend it in my weekly round up. It’s nice to find uplifting, inspirational words like this. I think your words can provide comfort / the kick up the bum to some people who really need it Kate!

    • Ah thank you Tinuke! I just try to say it as it is, but if anyone can get some comfort from them, well that’s just smashing. x p.s Thank you for the recommendation too!

  • Adore this post and you are absolutely right, we shouldn’t become wrapped up in others’ opinions, particularly those we don’t value or who simply don’t matter nor deserve our attention or thoughts. I love Peter’s attitude that we should be grateful to those who are unkind to us, because it allows us to see the bad eggs for who they really are, enabling us to remove them- they’re simply doing us a favour. I love how easy he, and men can tend to approach life, and I’m following his lead. I do definitely feel with age and particularly over the last year, I’ve stopped sweating the small stuff, I have a pretty thick skin and feel sure of my passions and direction in life and know those who love me. I feel so lucky that when I look around at my friends, I only have the true ones in my life ,and of course my family and husband are the most important people in my world. I think if you have those real loves, you become untouchable. Loved this darling x

    • Thank you darling. Peter is a wise man, in fact it reminds me a little of what Mayah Angelou once apparently told Oprah: that even in our darkest times, we should be thankful for the lessons they teach us. Sweating the small stuff is so silly isn’t it? But we all do it from time to time. Personally I find that if i’m firing on all cylinders and feeling great, I don’t really care a jot about other people’s opinions…but when the opposite it true, well it can definitely be a little struggle. We’re all only human after all! So glad you’ve found your loving tribe! :) x

  • Fabulous post huni. I think as I get older I am definitely caring less. I think we age we feed our soul via other means, family and true friends. So we begin to care less about those who don’t really matter. xxxx

    • Very, very true my love. Getting older (and a little wiser) definitely puts things into perspective and we begin to feed our souls differently xxx

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