Some say that a bond between a mother and her child is the strongest human bond there is.
And whilst I know that sadly this isn’t always the case, I’m beginning to realise exactly what people mean. As a new Mum, I now get it. I understand.
It’s love, but not as you know it.
I like to think I know how to love and be loved. I certainly hope so. And I’m not talking about those heady highs of first love or those lustful infatuations (as nice as they are), but true love, that makes you put someone else’s happiness before your own.
There are different kinds of love of course. What you feel for your parents is completely different to how you feel about your husband, partner or a friend. I know this. I also knew that my love for Elsie would be different to what I feel for anyone else. I just never realised (and how could I?) how overwhelming and totally absorbing it is, the love you have for your child.
I loved Elsie before I even met her. From the moment the word pregnant popped up on my pregnancy test, my maternal instinct well and truly kicked in. It was my job to keep my unborn baby safe, happy, content and healthy and it was a gift and responsibility that I never took for for granted.
But when she finally came into the world and I saw her face and looked into her eyes for the first time, something else happened, something I’ve not really experienced before – absolute unconditional love.
From her head to her teeny tiny toes, there isn’t a part of Elsie which I do not adore.
There’s no face I’ve seen in my lifetime which is more beautiful than hers, no smile as perfect, no sound as sweet. And her smell, I just can’t get enough of her smell! If I could bottle it and wear it everyday for the rest of my life I would. (I know how weird that sounds!)
When she cries, I cry. When she smiles, I smile. At three months old, it’s the little things she does – a smile, a coo, a chuckle – which are the biggest highlights of my day.
I have an instinctive urge to protect and cherish her at all costs. I worry constantly, sleep lightly and love her deeply.
I am a Mum. :)
Till the next time,