How kind are you? (Like really)
THIS morning I read a piece by one of my favourite bloggers James Altucher.
I’ve mentioned many a time how much I love this guy’s work but seriously if you haven’t checked out his phenomenal blog yet (and subscribed) then please do because it is BRILLIANT. And life changing. (And I do not say that lightly.)
Anyway. I was reading this particular piece when I came across this line, which really struck me in my tracks.
“Treat everyone as if it’s their last day alive and they don’t know it.”
Good isn’t it?
So good in fact that I’m sat here thinking about how my day got off to a horrid start and feeling pretty ashamed that this morning, the way I treated my loved ones was anything but this. Anything but loving. Anything but kind.
Kindness. So needed. So important. But sometimes SO bloody hard to put into action.
I know some incredible people who just ooze kindness from their every pore. I also know others who well, don’t even seem to try.
And it got me thinking, where on earth do I fit in this? Which category would I pop myself in? Which category would others put me in?
I like to think I’m a kind person. But am I? Like really?! (You don’t need to answer this.)
Or am I just kind when it suits me? On a good day? When I’m feeling like me and the universe are in good flow?
It’s easy to show kindness and make a little effort when you’re feeling happy and on top of the world. When you feel like life is treating you well, it’s natural to want to treat others well too.
But to do it when you’re feeling under the weather, are having one of ‘those days’ or are in pain? Well it kinda goes out of the window then, doesn’t it?
But what if you meet someone today and it IS their last day on this planet? What if the words that you speak today ARE the last ones someone will hear?
And what if you’re not kind at all but selfish, miserable and angry. What if the words you say aren’t loving and complimentary but harsh, unfair or offensive?
What then?
I thought that as soon as I read that line and it’s haunted me for the past hour.
Because we get things wrong. Because we take people for granted.
Because we all think our loved ones will be here forever. Because we all allow life to get on top of us.
Because we are all too busy, too tired, too stressed to even be kind to ourselves sometimes, let alone anyone else.
At the moment I feel like life has become too fast, like I’m struggling to keep up with the race. And as a result there have been a few days of late when I’ve felt rubbish. Rubbish and grumpy and overwhelmed.
So guess what? Yep, my kindness levels are low. And my patience is almost nil.
This isn’t me. Nor is it how I want to be. Thank goodness, I’ve had a reminder.
So today – thanks to super James – I am going to damn well choose kindness. And firstly, for myself.
Yep, today I’m going to treat and talk to myself as if it’s MY last day on earth (I really hope it’s not) and show myself a little more love.
Because I need it. Because it starts with ourselves. Because if there’s nothing ‘in the pot’ I have nothing to give.
And then?
Well then I’m going to try and spread a little bit of kindness around.
I’m going to call my husband and apologise for snapping at him this morning because I was in so much pain with my back and tell him that I love him.
I’m going to pick Elsie up from my Mum’s and greet her with a big smile and a huge cuddle.
I’m going to smile at passing strangers I meet on the street (even if they think I’m bonkers) and tonight I’m going to share my blogging knowledge with a room full of creative people and do it as kindly as I can.
Because we all need kindness. Because we all deserve to be treated as if it’s our last day on earth (just in case it is).
And because kindness is a funny thing, in that it spreads!
Here’s hoping that kindness – in whatever shape or form – also finds you today. And that if it does, you’ll do your best to pass a little of it on to other people too and work some wonders.
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Speaking of kindness, blogger pals, don’t forget to vote for your favourite bloggers in the Bibs 2015! Nominations are now open and are the perfect way to send some blogging love towards some well deserving people. X
With love,
Kate
Pic: Masque Photography
This post is linked to #BrilliantBlogPosts & #SundayStars
This rang so true for me today too. I have not been sleeping well, have been run down and think I have a horrible cold coming on. I have little patience and a pretty crazy temper at the moment. I need to take a step back, take a deep breath and be kind. :-) Thank you for this beautiful post! xx
My absolute pleasure Lauryn! Yep step back, breaaaattthhhhheee and be kind to yourself. Things always seem a bit easier after that! x
So glad I read this today, I need to be a bit kinder to those closest to me. Ive been so tired recently, snapping at my oldest and taking my husband for granted. ☹
Aww bless you Katy! We all do it, we shouldn’t but we do. We’re only human after all! Tiredness is brutal but when you can, try and turn that frown upside down Mama! :) Hope you feel more like yourself soon. x
Brilliant! Thank you for the reminder x
My pleasure! Thanks Hannah! x
Oh I love this hun, you are so, SO wise, when days are tough and we don’t feel our best, it’s so hard to feel kind (to ourselves and others) but it’s so important. Such a wonderful reminder, and a beautifully written post too, you know I’ll be voting for you chick x
Thank you so much darling. We all need that reminder from time to time don’t we? (You know i’ll also be voting for you too darling!) x
Such a thought provoking post and what a happier and kinder place the world would be if we carried this phrase with us. Completely agree that we need to start with being kinder to ourselves…something I find hard to do at times. Definitely going to check James’s blog out.
x
Thank you Laura. Yep kindness def begins with ourselves. You will LOVE James’ blog. The man is a guru. Love him! x
This is spooky, because for the second time today another blogger has written a post articulating thoughts that have been going round in my own head. It is so difficult to be super on top of the world all the time, and when the chips are down, kindness can slip because our own pain and suffering take up residence and can be hard to shake. It’s probably when we need to exhibit kindness the most though, and certainly helps to snap us out of our grump. Hope you & hubby have made up now. Big hugs xxx
Renee, we must be on the same super wave length I reckon ;-) I agree with everything you say, suffering can be hard to shake but my goodness, we have to give it a go don’t we?! All well now in the Portman house thankfully ;-) xxx
I think being kind is so important. Being kind can make such a difference to someone’s day and yours. My Father told me years ago to treat everyone like it was their last day, like you would never get the chance to see them again and that has always stuck with me. I want people to think kindly of me and I think the only real way to do that is with kindness. This post speaks right to my heart lovely and I so hope it shows the importance of such a simple yet powerful thing. x x
Thanks Toni. It definitely does, we all need and deserve to be treated kindly and i love how your Dad has used this amazing phrase for years! I’d never heard of it before but I certainly won’t forget it now. :) xxx
Oh lovely Katie, this is beautiful. Kindness is an underrated quality (that you have in spades). Kindness often doesn’t take much, but is so important. As you say, it’s important to not only be kind to others, but to yourself too. We all have off days, but we need to be able to forgive ourselves (working on that one myself). And I shall most certainly be nominating you! :) xxx
It’s great that you wrote a post about such an important, but overlooked part of our lives. I do try to live along the lines of ‘treat others like you would like to be treated’ – though I’m not religious. Your quote raises the bar a few knoches.
#SundayStars
Just beautiful!! I had some news today that reminded me just how precious and unpredictable life can be, so this post is particularly pertinent. So very important to remember kindness to yourself as well. #sundaysstars
I like to think I’m kind, but its always something you can improve on we all have those crappy days where its hard to not take it out on everyone great post really got me thinking I’m also going to check out the blog you mentioned thanks x
I choose kindness too! What an amazing post lovely xxx (another amazing post!!) You are so right, even tonight I’m so tired and have a sore throat , so I was in no mood for Reuben to come out of his room a dozen times – I wish I’d read this post first :( I think I would have approached that different…Definitely food for thought, thank you (and you are most definitely kind if you ask me) xxxxxx
Oh Kate, first off I think you are most definitely in the ‘kind camp’ but we do all have our off days don’t we. I so agree with you about being snappy and snarky some days and then feeling guilty afterwards. Thank you for reminding me about what should be such a simple thing but is often so difficult. Beautiful words xxx
Yes I agree so much! I try most days to tell myself not to snap at the twins, or at my Hubby and this usually is failed by mid morning! I find my tiredness a real killer. If I’m well rested then I’m an angel! I am being kinder to people I come across as I can’t stand unkindness. Great post and thanks for sharing #sundaystars Jess x
Thank you for sharing that quote and such a thought-provoking post. It is hard to be kind sometimes, especially to ourselves and if our own reserves are low, it is difficult to then extend that kindness to others. I am often guilty of being unkind and snappy with my family and your words have made me think that I need to start trying to change that.
Hi kate. I’ve been reading your beautiful blog for a while but only dropped by for occasional comment. I really love this post. Today I’ve been trying to rewrite and define what my blog is really about. Reading this reminded me what is really important to me. I hope you don’t mind that I’ve linked to it? Rachel x