I’M sometimes amazed that we are not called jugglers instead of humans.

As juggling is what us humans do, have to do, and lots of it.

Personally I’ve never been any good at you know, the proper juggling (although the husband is admittedly a whizz) but when it comes to juggling life and all the stuff that comes with it, well I fair a little better.

Sometimes I feel like a pro. Other times, not so much.

Whenever I look at jugglers I always feel sorry for their two hands. Just their two hands to catch and throw everything and keep it all in the air.

And when it comes to us and how much we have to juggle in life, well those two hands just are never enough are they? It’s no wonder so many of us drop so many balls all over the place.

I don’t think I really knew how hard juggling life stuff is until I became a parent either. When Elsie arrived, all 8 pounds and four ounces of her gorgeous, precious self, two hands seemed ridiculous. Although to be fair even twenty hands would not have been enough at certain times.

Suddenly not only did I have my own balls to juggle but hers two. In fact between you and I, sometimes I think it’s a miracle that I manage to keep any of life’s balls up in the air at all.

There’s always so much to do isn’t there?

And often it feels unbearable. The pressure. Lists. Dates on the calendar. Worries. Future plans.

Writing is my way of escapism. Yet as I sit here typing this, it’s taking a heroic effort not to worry or think about all the many, many balls I’ve had to put down for a while so I can concentrate on getting some words out of my mind and onto here.

Like so many of us, my list is endless.

As my pregnancy rattles on quicker than I like, as work opportunities mount up and pressures increase, sometimes I feel like I just can’t breathe with it all.

There’s just too much stuff to deal with. Daily stuff. Weekly stuff. Future stuff.

But then I know that I don’t need to tell any of you this, because no doubt you’re often in the same boat too. Especially if you’re a parent. Especially if you’re trying to create a good life for your family.

So how do I cope? How do I manage everything I need to manage?

These are two questions I have been asked a lot since I started working for myself and since I set up this very blog. Sometimes I get an email from a reader (thank you!) asking me these very things. Other times friends will ask me how I fit everything in.

And the absolute truth is, often I don’t.

Often I drop all of the balls and sometimes even struggle to remember which ones I need to pick up first and get moving again.

Sometimes I will weep. Or even sob. Depending how bad my day has been. I often get furious with the demands life puts on me, that is until I take a moment to remember that many of these are ones that I have put on myself. (The truth can hurt right?)

And on my darkest of days, when things feel stressful and a bit bleak, I usually swear to myself that I will quit work, ditch this blog and go and take my family to live in the middle of a nowhere, a pretty meadow perhaps, in a little painted gypsy caravan and surround us with clucking chickens and hens.

(I like this particular dream a lot.)

Sometimes as a blogger, people often tell me that my life looks perfect, exciting or glamorous and there are some people who have been open about their envy regarding the fact that I work from home or work for myself.

Some think my life is easier or less stressful or that I’ve found the holy grail of the perfect life / work balance. But I haven’t. Who has?!

What I have found though is an imperfect balance of sorts, that often changes and shifts, but works for me.

My life is full, it’s varied, sometimes exciting, often mundane but mostly wonderful – it’s true I’m very blessed – but just like anyone else, sometimes it can all feel a bit too bloody much at times.

And do you know what? The older I get and the more chaotic my life becomes, the more I’m beginning to realise that this is OK.

It’s taken me a long time to get here but now I know that it’s OK to feel like I’m drowning or to drop loads of balls all over the floor. I can only do so much. I can only try my best.

Sometimes I fall behind on everything. Other times I feel like I’ve got this life stuff, nailed and all going on.

This is my life.

So I’m sorry if you expected or hoped for a post that would provide you with all the answers to your ‘drowning’ in life stuff experience. Perhaps I’ve failed you. Perhaps you were hoping I could you send you a lifeboat or ply you with a multitude of ideas.

But I can’t and I won’t.

I won’t sell you a lie or add to the pressure that already lies on your knackered shoulders. I won’t tell you if you just do x, y and z that you’ll be able to fit more stuff in, juggle more balls.

There are some great ideas on organisation and time management around. Tricks and tips which can and will help and I urge you to seek them out and implement them if that’s what you wish.

But don’t expect them to turn into your life raft. Don’t cling to them with all of your hope.

Instead I simply ask you to try and accept that we all ‘drown’ in life from time to time. To acknowledge that we’re all engulfed by it on occasion and that this is OK.

Sometimes more doing doesn’t work. Sometimes more organisation is not the answer. Sometimes the only option is to let go, ride the waves as best you can and succumb to it all.

And as for those balls? Well they can wait can’t they?

Pick them up when you are able but until then just keep breathing and try to enjoy the rocky ride.